Side-swiped. Ten things clicked into place today, and I am still taken back at how it all happened. Normally, I would write this on my more personal blog, but I feel this needs to be shared with my readers as to what the Lord has done; it is just too big.

Sometime, along the way, I have felt rejected. I have trained myself to ignore any personal hurt and focus on the hurting and doing what good I can accomplish. As I have pursued God in the past, I have felt me climb to new heights, and I only began to falter when I did not feel my unconditional love support any longer. Immediately, without realizing it, one falls from a process where one cares only about the Lord to where one desperately looks for that confidence. He will seek out anything to do it, try anything, go with anyone, follow crowds to gain only a heightened-short-lived feeling of this need. Most of the time, in my opinion, it is impossible to accomplish. It becomes you vs. the world.

To fight this and even being willing to change, the unconditional source must first be met. Someone needs to hear the other out in their entirety and THEN choose to spend time with him to accomplish this. Once this individual understands his feelings are acknowledged and someone is willing to understand the burden with him, the conflicted individual gains room to grow, opens himself up to moving with the Lord, etc.

Facebook brings rejection; it is constantly a gauge of people telling other people what they do/do not like. This gauge cannot be what we go by, for we have to go on our own path to follow the Lord.

I have lost it. I have lost my focus. I still care about others in my current state, but I have not been able to love them unconditionally because I was not filling my void of relentless love. I have wondered why my love has grown cold for so many individuals, and now it makes sense, I NEED to feel this assurance in order for me to pour it out. You can only love, support, give hope to the degree you have received this. **new added park**  This is a constant need that needs to be filled. Receive love unconditionally, and watch one change the world.

This is not only a call for understanding; this is a call to meet the needs of others. Something I used to understand that I shockingly forgot is that only unconditional love will allow the lost to feel loved and give them a desire to meet the Lord.

I feel myself regaining strength, and as I begin to slowly desire to go new places with God, I pray that the Lord sends more sources for me to feed from in case my current sources leave or something gets ruined. I find it interesting that many people have shown me this love throughout this time, yet I have not opened up to them. Why?

As I begin this state of change/revivification, I pray that I remain strong enough before I get sent out again.

I can feel that the best is yet to come.